Gossip is something we have ALL been a part of. Of course, no one wants to admit it! No one says “Why yes, I’m a big fat gossip and I love it.” But most of us are guilty of this on a regular basis!
Gossip is a fire to the rumors. A knife to reputations. It brings people down and tears friendships apart. It brings turmoil into otherwise healthy relationships and it most certainly brings distrust and insecurity to those being talked about. It’s destructive and it’s running rampant in today’s society. And dare I say it…in today’s Christian community.
Most people that I know have gossiped and most everyone I know has listened to gossip. It is SO easy to do, right? What starts out as a seemingly normal conversation can very quickly turn into a less than factual telling of so-and-so’s situation.
More than once, I have found myself in a situation where the conversation I have been a part of has become gossip. (Sometimes by my own doing!) As Christians what is our place in this? What should be our aim? To run our mouths about each other and the things we are struggling with? To let our friends know about another friend’s dramatic situation?
Our aim as Christ-centered women should be to uplift each other, not tear each other down. We should be speaking life and prayer into each others’ lives!
So, how should we deal with things like gossip? Easy: confront it head on! While I hate confrontation, I am most definitely NOT scared of it. However, lately I’ve been a little slack in the gossip department. And not on purpose. I just got lazy in this area and didn’t follow my gut in a few difficult situations.
One thing I’ve learned to do recently is to confront the gossip in a loving way, even if you started it! If you point out the fact that the conversation has turn to gossip the conversation is most likely going to stop. I realized that it’s okay to walk away from a conversation if you’re uncomfortable with the way it’s headed. Usually when you come from a place of love and humility people will hear your heart on the matter. If they don’t…walk away!
Once I realized that there were a few situations that I probably could have avoided, I began to really pray that God would reveal how I should handle the next “gossip sesh” I was a part of. And in true God fashion, He brought to my attention verses and passages that totally spoke to my heart and I wanted to share those with you.
A few weeks ago I kept coming across this verse from Ephesians 4, “Don’t let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” It just so happened that this was right after I had listened to one friend talk bad about another friend…and I joined in!
After seeing this verse around social media and devotionals about four times in a week I figured I should probably pray on this. This was one of those moments God was showing me this verse over and over to grab my attention and point out an area I needed to work on in my life! Okay God, I hear ya!
So why should we be cautious about what we say and listen to? Why Should we get rid of the gossip?
Because we are representing Christ in our actions and in every word we say. (Eph 5:1-2)
Because speaking harshly about another person is not showing them love. Instead it brings hurt. (1 John 4:16).
Because gossip brings trouble. (Prov 21:23).
Because you will have to answer for it one day. (Mat 12:36-37).
What is your heart behind what you are saying? Is your intention to help a friend in trouble, to lift that friend in prayer with other believers, or to approach other close friends about how to handle a situation?
Is what you’re saying helpful? Is it according to that person’s needs? Is it loving?
These are things that God has been dealing with me in my own friendships, work life, and family. And let me tell you, when I looked at back at the past few months of my life, I can’t say my talk has always been wholesome or loving.
Let this be our prayer together: that we can grow in our walk with Christ and be intentional about what we listen to and what we speak about others. Let’s focus on building each other up, encouraging one another and praying for each other.
“Set a guard over my mouth, O Lord. Keep watch over the door of my lips.” –Psalm 141:3
This post was linked up to the Grace and Truth Link Up.